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Footloose and 12 Years CANCER FREE!!!


12 years ago today, I was in Omaha, Nebraska waiting to receive my stem cells.  I had been through 2 years of absolute hell.  9 rounds of intense chemotheraphy, an experimental radio labeled anitbody treatment and over 60 radiation treatments, among shots, transfusions and bouts of extreme nausea.  And this was the culminating event?

I remember so many things as if they were yesterday.  As a cancer survivor, you never forget.  These things are engraved in your mind to make you appreciate every day.  I remember having mouth sores so bad that I was on morphine.  In my absolute blur, I saw a gatorade commercial and the guy was drinking fruit punch flavored gatorade.  I assume that anyway, because it was red.  Till this day, I CRAVE fruit punch gatorade when I am thirsty.  I remember not eating for 22 days (my rear end says otherwise these days) and not being able to taste for months.  The first time I took a sip of diet dr. pepper and tasted it, I thought I'd won the lottery.  The night I told my mom, "You have to let me go" because I was losing control of my body is one I'll never forget, although I wish I could.

Being a survivor is an amazing, but tough.  I wish there were a day that I could wake-up and not think about it.  But that has yet to happen.  Especially now that I have 3 precious lives that depend on me. One of my biggest worries about this dreadful disease ever coming back, is Kael, Karis and Kort.  I want them to have me as their mommy.....forever.  But life is no guarantee, so maybe that's why I choose to live my life with no regret.

My mom, dad and Karekin were my care partners, and I cannot ever thank them enough.  They were and still my absolute heros.  I can remember Karekin racing me in the gurney down the halls with reckless abandonment.  I just wanted to feel free of everything and he had a way of doing that for me.  My time with him during my cancer was priceless.  He was so scared of losing me and I was so scared of leaving him.  My dad was and still is the one person in my life that can make everything better.  He couldn't fix this, but he came close in every way imaginable.  My mom....I don't even know where to start.  The God Lord kept me here, but she was right beside him.  She encouraged me on my darkest of days and reminded me that I had so much to live for.  She was so right.  I love them all with every part of my being.  They loved me unconditionally.

And Heather....she was and still is my best friend.  She was always there for me, even when I pushed her away.  She believed in me.  And she had my shiny bald head in her wedding.  Oh our wig shopping story!!!  I love you H, and thank you for true friendship.

So on this day, I am reminded of how much God loves me.  How he does perform miracles.  I was 4th stage with 10% chance to make it. My mom gave me this and I live by it!!

She Who Lives With No Regrets
She dares to dream...
And then lives like she means it!
Embracing both the triumphs and tragedies of her life
As the rich growth opportunities they are.
She refuses to let either one distort her view.
Seeing new possibilities at every juncture,
She makes the world a better place
And infinitely more interesting
With wild abandonment,
She seizes the moment
And truly lives every minute of her life.
Basking in an unparalleled opportunity
For the chance to be more,
She has evolved into the magnificent creature
God always intended her to be. 

Life is short, eat dessert first.  Forgive quickly.  Always say I love you.  Hug your kids daily.  Be who you are.  Never make excuses for what you believe in.  Thank God for loving you!!!




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Cookies with Daddy

Last year for Christmas, my mom bought Kael some sports cookie cutters.  He loves to cook and create things.  He definitely got Rob's artistic side.  He enjoys doing all these sorts of things.  So the other night, he found the cookie cutters and said, "Mommy, we haven't used these in a while."  And he was right.  So off to Wally World we go, to buy sugar dough and decorative icing tubes.  He was super excited!!  And since Daddy is such the artist, I thought, "What a perfect thing for them to do together!!"  I'm always reminding Rob how much Kael loves his time with just him.  He is a great daddy and I loved watching them do this together.  We had some Captain America shield cookies, footballs, and baseballs, to name a few.  They were amazing!!!  And of course, we had a super hero costume on while doing it!!





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"Cheers"


So every time Kael we are at a restaurant and Kael gets his "sweet tea," he likes to clink glasses and say "cheers!"  hmm.....wonder where he learned that one!!!  SO I thought this picture captured a "cheers" moment!!  all 3 K kids loving their cocktails.  They are so funny.  Check out the way Kort hold his bottle.  Yes, I'm in trouble!!!

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chillin' out @ the lake

We had an awesome Labor Day Weekend.  I started it off Friday night going to Girl's Night Out at the Braves game.  Had an awesome time with some friends from work.  We need to do it more often for sure!!  Saturday we took the K Kids to a birthday party.  Karis and Kort are becoming quite the little fishes.  They are jumping in and going underwater with no fear.  Kael, of course, was playing superheroes in the water and managed to battle all the bad guys.  We are super thankful for him for keeping us all safe.

Sunday, we headed out to Lake Jackson.  Rob's family has a house on the lake and they have been working very hard getting it all fixed-up.  They bought a pontoon boat and a couple of seadoo's, so the kids had a ball.  Kael loves to play with his cousins, and it warms my heart when he does.  What is life without family.    Karis and Kort loved riding in the boat and just relaxing.  They all really had a great time, added by an awesome fish fry and all the fixings.

My entire weekend was topped off by having a pajama day on a rainy Monday with my kids, while watching the US Open tennis.  Life could not get any better than that!!

Here are a few pics of the K Kids chillin' at the lake.









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my #1 superhero

Okay.....so who said dress-up was for girls?  My Kael LOVES to play "dress-up."  You name the superhero, we have the costume.  There are always "siterations" as Kael calls them, brewing at our home.  The bad guys are lurking in every corner, and he is ready to "serve and protect."

This past year, it was transformers....Bumblebee and Optimus Prime.  But we have moved on to include the MARVEL series.  Spiderman, Iron Man, Captain American and the Hulk.  Plus a knight and a black ninja.  Last year, I hit the 90% off section at Wally World and stocked-up on costumes.  We also have the weapons to support these superhero powers.  From the Spider Man Web Shooter that shoots silly string (Thanks Heather) to the Iron Man chest light and hand, we can then move to the Captain America shield that has actually worked.....it knocked Kort out (who was the bad guy) and gave him his first black eye.  Rest assured, we have the artillery right here at home.

It really is fun to watch him become these superheroes.  His imagination runs ramped!!
He's almost too pretty to be a "superhero."

Even Capt. America has to go.

In "battle"

Knight

Check out the pose

The face is priceless.  

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we "heart" kisses

Check out Kael, Karis and Kort giving each other kisses.
We love each other, most of the time!!!

"Pucker-up"

Could they be any cuter?  This picture makes me melt.

I love my brother!!


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a "nip" of fall in the air

It was beautiful today.  There was a nip of fall in the air.  I always love when the seasons change.  It's just about the time you are so ready for hot or cold....whatever it may be.  I love summer and all that it brings. Hot days by the pool, sleeping in, no schedule, being with my kids all day every day, golf cart rides, and on and on......But I love fall too.   I love all the fall colors...I love Halloween...I love wearing my jeans and boots.....college football...WAR EAGLE.....and on and on....  But now that I have 3 kids under the age of 4, I also LOVE being able to be outside and play.  It has been way too hot to do that....BUT today was one of those days.  We got out the ride on toys, opened the sandbox, and just PLAYED all day!!!  It was perfect.  Check out the K kids growing up and just playing!!

My sweet baby girl is growing-up way too fast. 

My princess Karis Annslee

Ready to go on the cart!!


What do you mean smile?

Cruising topless!!!


Swinging!!

Playing at the sandbox

I'm getting too big for this swing!!

Captain America is in action.

My little monkeys!!

Playing in the sprinkler.

It's cold!!!!!

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